I know a ton of great and fabulous women. Even though these women are gorgeous, funny and amazing, they all still find faults with themselves. It could be one fault and something so petty as they don't like the shape of their eyebrows. I just wish for one day or even one hour women could see themselves as others see them. We are so hard on ourselves and compare ourselves to airbrushed photos of women with their make-up professionally done and their hair professionally styled with extensions. We all know how idiotic that looks off the pages of a magazine, just look at Kim Kardashian.
My mother said as we get older we start not to care as much about certain things, like what people think about us, and that's true, but the problem really is what we think of ourselves. What value do we give ourselves when we find so many flaws and fixable things. When did flaws become flaws? I thought all the rage is to embrace your flaws and that's what they look for in the modeling world. When did flaw become the word to use instead of unique. Unique face, unique body, unique sense of humor. If we all were the same then we would just be a bunch of cyborgs, some stepford wives running around with the cookie cutter image.
We can blame society, men, the media, or whomever you want to blame for women trying to achieve the impossible with their bodies and faces, but when are we going to take ownership of feeling the need to change? In the HBO series Girls Lena Dunham doesn't have the perfect face or body but is naked and having sex in pretty much ever episode with different men. Why do I even have the right to say she doesn't have a perfect face or body? Who am I to judge? A lot of people feel that way though and she has said she's been pressured to be this or that, now she has her own series that is amazing and she is the writer and director. When Mike and Molly appeared on CBS there was an uproar because people were saying who wants to watch two fat people in a relationship and having sex. A lot of women have caved to pressure, but Melissa McCarthy didn't and basically said well then don't watch. These women see their value in the world and love their lives. I just wish that more women would see their amazing value and contributions.
Hopefully some women will read this article and think about those little things they hate about themselves and embrace it. Maybe they will see that they are beautiful even if they don't look like Scarlett Johansson. Every one is beautiful in their own way.
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Friday, October 11, 2013
You buy a new house. You are incredibly excited and cannot wait to move in. Wouldn't you want to know if a convicted violent offender lived right next door? We have a national sex offender registry. We have strictly enforced rules for them. Why is Illinois the only state with a convicted murder/violent offender against youth registry? I will tell you why. In 1998, my friend was brutally murdered by her ex-boyfriend. She was only 18 years of age. The murderer got convicted to only 24 years for first-degree murder and because of his good behavior, he only served about 12 years. He served 12 years for cold blooded murder of an innocent girl who just did not want to be his girlfriend anymore. When he got released, he was in his early 30's, got married, and moved to beautiful Hawaii. He gets to live the rest of his life, have children, Christmas, birthdays, and be known as Joe Schmo, your next door neighbor. Andrea, the girl he so callously murdered, doesn't get that luxury. Her family doesn't get that luxury. Her mother decided to do something about it.
Thursday, August 15, 2013
The first girl is tried and true, the Drama Queen. Men may say but wait! We hate dating Drama Queen's, that's not true! Well then sir, why is it you always pick them over the great girl who has her shit together? Do not deny it, you love it. You love when that girl gets drunk in a club and is always trying to fight other girls (and a lot of guys), you get kicked out of the club, and you have to carry her out kicking and screaming. Did you break up with her the first time it happened? The second? The third? Exactly. There is a difference between a woman staying down for her man and being his ride or die than a crazy drunk bitch starting something and creating a scene because she thinks someone gave her the side eye. You love drama. Even worse, you love your Drama queen's.
The second kind of girl is what I like to call the Ke$ha girl. Now be weary because she is much like the Drama Queen, but much more chaotic and volatile. The Drama Queen, is extremely insecure, the Ke$ha has way too much ego for no reason. She's just as crazy and unstable, she drinks and gets in fights, but it is taken to a whole new level. To know if you're dating a Ke$ha is very simple. If you wake up the next morning with glitter all over your face, sheets, and floor; you're dating a Ke$ha. If she has more than one pair of ripped fisnets she wears out in public, you're dating a Ke$ha. Run, don't walk, far far away.
The third type of toxic girl is Miss Dependence. Where you at? Who are you with? You haven't called me in an hour? You have 15 missed calls and texts. Kick this fatal attraction to the curb or Glenn Close will be breaking in your house and boiling your child's pet rabbit on the stove. (Look it up, it's a movie, and possibly your future). Nothing could scare me more than a clown following me down a dark back alley. This girl has lower self esteem than the Drama Queen, and is more insane than a mental patient. Her insanity knows no bounds. She will call you, call all your friends, and even call your mother until she tracks you down. She would love to microchip you like a lost cat or dog. This is the girl your mother warned you about. Unless you want her at your door always accusing you of cheating, get out and get out NOW!
Saturday, August 10, 2013
The first one is a favorite of mine and to many ladies out there, the emotionally unavailable guy. This is the most dangerous of all the toxic men. He is a problem because he's hard to spot until you are too deep in that you have feelings for him. You also make a ton of excuses for him as well because you do not know this is the unavailable man. He does not call, he does not return texts, you see him online on facebook and he will stay on and never talk to you but say he never saw you online, and the secret of women is that you secretly love it because he's elusive and you love the chase. You'll never catch him, but you always think you can change him or you'll be the one that he will finally fall for.
When he spends time with you, it's amazing and wonderful. When you ever talk about a relationship or taking it further, there is always the best excuses from this unemotional man; it's usually "bad timing" or "he doesn't have enough time to dedicate to you", "he just got out of a relationship and doesn't want to rush into another one", or he just flat out tells you "I'm not ready for a relationship". The problem is that you continue to chase him, it could last years. If it does last years, you start to call him your boyfriend, but girl...he isn't and never will be. I'm sure all of his problems are hard; he lost his job, his grandma died, etc., but in a real relationship you lean on each other in the hard times, you do not use those as excuses to not date. Wake up ladies! Like the famous movie and book says; he's just not that into you.
|Courtesy of Google Images|
The Second Type that all the women will be nodding their head to while reading this is the bad boy. Oh yes, he looks cool, he's mysterious, and he has that thing that just draws you to him. He has a sweet car, nice clothes and style, a whole lot of swagger, and...always seems to live with his mom. That's ok we tell ourselves, it's just temporary and he's trying to get his life together, trying to get back on his feet. That bad boy does what he wants when he wants, although it always seems that when you are over visiting him, the 30 year old "bad boy" is always arguing with his mom about laundry. That's ok you tell yourself, let's just push that to the side because he's hot and everyone wants him, but I'm the one that has him! Aren't I the lucky one! Yes, 30 year old high school drop outs are hot commodities out on the streets of other high school drop outs going no where living with their moms. You'll keep telling yourself how hot he is until the luster wears off and you realize he's going to play the bad boy card until he's 90 thinking he's Hugh Hefner while driving a Pinto. He's not James Dean. He's just James no name from down the street.
|Courtesy of Google Images|
Our next lovely candidate produces himself in a flash. He takes you on a great date, he pays, he picks you up, and you have a lovely time. He isn't emotionally unavailable and he does not have hardly any baggage. He doesn't live with his mom and he has his own place. He has a medium type job, maybe went to a community college, but never followed through on his degree, but he seems like a put together guy. Then the first signs starts to show. One day as you two are enjoying your relationship time together, he says he has something he's dreading to ask you, but he has to ask. He asks you for twenty bucks because he isn't getting paid until Friday and he has no gas. Ladies, this is the mooch. He seems like his life is semi put together, but once you give him that twenty bucks and he promises to pay you back this Friday when he gets his check (which will never happen because he will have another excuse as to why he can't pay you back), he will keep asking for more and more money. He'll keep telling you how much he loves you and how he will be making it up to you in the future and before you know it you're cashing out all of your IRA's and handing him ten grand. He'll never pay you back, he'll never make it up to you, and you'll just one day end up leaving him because you're sick of it and he'll move onto his next mark (I mean girl) and do it to her as well. Then you have to scramble for the next six months, you have no more investments to speak of, and have to get your life back on track like it was before you met this charismatic son of a bitch.
|Courtesy of Google Images|
There are many different types of men to look out for, I've just hit the tip of the iceberg. I could end up doing 10 more articles about men to watch out for. Maybe next time I will do an article for men about the types of ladies to watch out for and believe me, there are a ton of those as well!
Saturday, August 3, 2013
|Courtesy of Google Images|
Luckily nowadays we have the lovely Spotify. I found the Plain White T's and all of their music. I started listening to it and realized that for years I was truly missing out. Lovely Spotify first shows you all of their popular songs and I started there. One of my current favorite songs (there is a list now, but this is at the top) is Let Me Take You There and is on their 2006 album "Every Second Counts". That whole album has the most amazing songs. I pretty much love this whole album. I recommend listening to it all. Hate (I Really Don't Like You) is a great song as well. Pretty much all they write about is relationships, failed relationships, and girls. I think every guy and girl can relate to these songs. I also think if you're looking for something to listen to, something with emotion and great beats/lyrics, and have not already checked out these guys, give them a chance and do not judge like I did on the over-played Hey There Delilah.
|Courtesy of Google Images|
Thursday, August 1, 2013
You may love him, you may hate him, but Simon Cowell has done something lower than anything he's ever said to any contestant on a singing show. Not only did he has an adulterous affair with his best friend's wife, but he impregnated her. He has no shame about it either because they have been spotted together, photographed together, and confirmed it, even though the divorce is not final yet.
Courtesy of NY Daily Mail
She's a New York Socialite that is 20 years his junior, and she's definitely his type if you've seen any of Cowell's exes. Andrew Silverman, a property developer, has made some harsh allegations in his Divorce Petition. Silverman is alleging Adultery in his Petition and naming Cowell as the Co-Defendant along with Lauren Silverman. If he proves cheating then Cowell and Lauren Silverman's child will have to take a DNA test. Both Defendants seem to be in love and almost flaunting it, not caring whether or not their picture is taken. Both Defendants have spoken to the press about wanting it to be a girl, however, in all of this love and scorn there is one problem. The seven year old child between Lauren and Andrew Silverman. Andrew is seeking full custody because of this "cruel and inhumane treatment" by the Defendants. This poor boy is stuck in the middle of his mother and father. I believe Andrew Silverman has every right to be bitter and upset, his best friend had an affair and impregnated his own wife. If you cannot trust your best friend and wife, who can you trust? However, to prevent the current child they have together from seeing his mother is a different ball of wax all together. Not only is he trying for sole custody of the child, but considering the divorce circumstances, he's also trying to enforce the pre-nup she signed in 2003. Lauren Silverman not only is a socialite (which mean she comes from money and is not hurting for it), but also if Simon sticks by her side, she will not want for anything either.
Simon Cowell and Andrew Silverman
Andrew was completely blind sighted from the affair and pregnancy. Sources also say that Cowell thought his indiscretions with the female Silverman were along the lines of friends with benefits and no strings attached. I am unaware how you can live with yourself having a no strings "relationship" with your best friends girl, but maybe Rick Springfield can shed some light. (If you do not get that joke then you are too young). Cowell now has to soften or has softened about the idea about having kids because in the passed he has stated either he was not that fond of them or "passed his window" in being too old now. I guess you have to wonder, if he thought this was just an adulterous fling with his then best friends' wife, will he stay by her side? He did not seem to care much about children or the woman, but now they are inseparable together, seemingly to be in a relationship. If Cowell does not sit by her side, she has enough family money to fend for herself, but now this is a knock down drag out fight filled with hurt feelings with the divorce and a child in the middle. What makes it worse is that this is a seven year old who is fully aware of what is going on around him. Whether or not you like Simon Cowell (I do because of his blunt candor), you cannot respect a man like this at all whatsoever He is a homewrecker, uncaring about what destruction he leaves in his path, even a poor child.
|Lauren Silverman and son with Andrew Silverman (TMZ.com)|
Even though friends and family have been saying the marriage has been on the rocks for some time, this is definitely no way to act out or help the marriage in any way whatsoever. Especially when there are children involved, the female Silverman should have filed for divorce and tried to settle thing amicably, not have an affair with her husbands best friend. Now, this will be one nasty divorce filled with bitterness, hurt feeling, and choice words flying around. Allegedly, when the Silverman's were married, his friends refused to go to the wedding. I guess they could sense something about her, however, Andrew was obviously in love. Andrew's own parents had their concerns about the relationship and wedding as well. I'm hoping the next time Andrew Silverman gets into any sort of relationship, he heeds the advice his friends and family are giving him. When the people around you are suspicious of the woman you are about to marry, they are only looking out for your best interest. This is going to be a very interesting story that I'm going to keep my eye on because this divorce is going to be as drama filled and as nasty as they come. Stay tuned for updates....
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
You can go the easy route and say he's physically attractive, he's hot, that's for sure. You can say his voice melts butter. The fact that he has the most beautiful girl on his arm, sure, that helps too. I'm talking about the fact that this man is not only hot, sings amazing, and is a one woman man, but the fact that he is a gentleman. He is one of the few left. Not only is he a gentleman, but he is always giving back to the community and helping various organizations. I can listen to his songs over and over, look at his pictures a million times, but if you actually do your research, follow his twitter and facebook, you will find that beneath this hot specimen there is the kindest soul ever. He is always playing concerts for charities and giving to various charities. He is not a womanizer or a player, you will not find this man at a club poppin' bottles. He is a gentleman with a plan and wants you to know it. He is intelligent and using his success for better things. To make this place a better planet to live in for future generations.
His newest album is called Love in the Future, and the newest song he's releasing is called Made to Love. That is what this man is, all about love. From his Twitter account alone, you can tell he stays educated with the most current news. He is for public school funding (who isn't) but he wants children to have the best education possible. He is an avid reader and once he read the book "The End of Poverty" by Dr. Jeffrey Sachs, that's when he knew he had to do something about what is going on in this world.
John Legend first established the Show Me Campaign to raise funds for Africa and their impoverished villages. He then teamed up with Sachs for the Millenium Promise Alliance to also serve needy impoverished African villages. These campaigns provide mosquito nets to prevent deaths from malaria and also provide free meals to children attending school. They are also creating safer water points and provide fertilizer to clinics to prevent food shortages.
As the gentleman he is, Legend also raises awareness for the Gentleman's Fund, is a spokesperson for Tide Loads of Hope (folding laundry for Katrina victims), and also participated heavily in Gap (Product) Red campaign where they sell t-shirts to benefit the Global Fund.
As you can see, he is not just a pretty face, not just a soulful singer, but a man with a big heart who enjoys spending his free time giving back to the community and impoverished communities around the globe. If you have yet to see the wonderful heart inside this man, here is a list of every single charity he has supported: